I prossimi due aerei che prenderò saranno della Ryanair.. e mio fratello Tatto ci ha tenuto a informarmi della gran quantità di barzellette dedicate a questa compagnia low cost.. quella che segue è la mia preferita, la trovate prima in italiano, tradotta da me, e a seguire in inglese, trovata online ;)
Arrivato in un albergo a Dublino, Michael O'Leary - amministratore delegato di Ryanair - andò al bar e chiese una pinta di Guinness alla spina. Il barista annuì e disse, "1€, grazie, Signor O'Leary."
Preso alla sprovvista, O'Leary replicò "È davvero economica" e porse i soldi.
"Beh, cerchiamo di battere la competizione", disse il barista. "E serviamo pinte gratuite ogni mercoledì sera dalle 18 alle 20. Abbiamo la birra più economica dell'Irlanda."
"Straordinario" commentò O'Leary
"Mi sembra che lei non abbia un bicchiere, probabilmente le servirà uno dei nostri. Sono 3€, per favore."
O'Leary si accigliò, ma pagò. Prese la sua birra e si voltò in direzione di una sedia.
"Ah, vuole sedersi" disse il barista "Sarebbero altri 2€ - avrebbe potuto prenotare la sedia, le sarebbe costato solo 1€. Credo che lei sia troppo grosso per la sedia, signore, posso chiederle di accomodarsi su questa panca?"
Michael provò a sedersi, ma la panca era troppo piccola e, non riuscendo a entrarvi, ribattè "Nessuno riuscirebbe a entrare in quella piccola panca"
"Ho paura che, se lei non riesce a entrare nella panca, dovrà pagare il supplemento di 4€ per la sedia, signore."
O'Leary imprecò sottovoce, ma pagò.
"Oh, vedo che ha con sè il portatile" aggiunse il barista. "Ma dato che non ha prenotato neanche questo sarebbero altri 3€."
O'Leary era talmente irritato che tornò al bancone sbattendovi sopra il bicchiere e urlò "Tutto questo è ridicolo, voglio parlare con il direttore".
"Ah, ha deciso di utilizzare il bancone," disse il barista, "sarebbero 2€ allora." O'Leary diventò rosso di rabbia.
"Lei sa chi sono io?"
"Ma certo, signor O'Leary"
"Ne ho abbastanza, che razza di albergo è questo? Sono venuto per bere qualcosa e vengo trattato in questo modo. Insisto, voglio parlare con il direttore!"
"Ecco l'indirizzo e-mail o, se preferisce, può contattarlo ogni mattina tra le 9 e le 9,10 dal lunedì al martedì a questo numero di telefono gratuito. Le telefonate sono gratuite fino alla risposta, poi c'è un addebito di 10 centesimi al secondo"
"Non tornerò mai più in questo bar"
"Va bene signore, ma si ricordi, siamo l'unico albergo in Irlanda che vende le pinte a 1€"
-
Arriving in a hotel in Dublin, Michael O’Leary - Chief Executive of Ryanair - went to the bar and asked for a pint of draught Guinness. The barman nodded and said, "That will be one Euro please, Mr. O’Leary."
Taken aback, O'Leary replied, "That's very cheap," and handed over his money.
"Well, we try to stay ahead of the competition", said the barman. "And we are serving free pints every Wednesday evening from 6 until 8. We have the cheapest beer in Ireland"
"That is very remarkable" Michael commented
"I see you don't seem to have a glass, so you'll probably need one of ours. That will be 3 euro please."
O'Leary scowled, but paid up. He took his drink and walked towards a seat.
"Ah, you want to sit down?" said the barman. "That'll be an extra 2 euro. - You could have pre-book the seat, and it would have only cost you a Euro."
"I think you may to be too big for the seat sir, can I ask you to sit in this frame please"
Michael attempts to sit down but the frame is too small and when he can't squeeze in he complains "Nobody would fit in that little frame".
"I'm afraid if you can't fit in the frame you'll have to pay an extra surcharge of €4.00 for your seat sir"
O'Leary swore to himself, but paid up. "I see that you have brought your laptop with you" added the barman. "And since that wasn't pre-booked either, that will be another 3 euro."
O'Leary was so annoyed that he walked back to the bar, slammed his drink on the counter, and yelled, "This is ridiculous, I want to speak to the manager".
"Ah, I see you want to use the counter," says the barman, "that will be 2 euro please." O'Leary's face was red with rage.
"Do you know who I am?"
"Of course I do Mr. O'Leary,"
"I've had enough, What sort of Hotel is this? I come in for a quiet drink and you treat me like this. I insist on speaking to a manager!"
"Here is his E mail address, or if you wish, you can contact him between 9 and 9.10 every morning, Monday to Tuesday at this free phone number. Calls are free, until they are answered, then there is a talking charge of only 10 cent per second"
"I will never use this bar again"
"OK sir, but remember, we are the only hotel in Ireland selling pints for one Euro"
Taken aback, O'Leary replied, "That's very cheap," and handed over his money.
"Well, we try to stay ahead of the competition", said the barman. "And we are serving free pints every Wednesday evening from 6 until 8. We have the cheapest beer in Ireland"
"That is very remarkable" Michael commented
"I see you don't seem to have a glass, so you'll probably need one of ours. That will be 3 euro please."
O'Leary scowled, but paid up. He took his drink and walked towards a seat.
"Ah, you want to sit down?" said the barman. "That'll be an extra 2 euro. - You could have pre-book the seat, and it would have only cost you a Euro."
"I think you may to be too big for the seat sir, can I ask you to sit in this frame please"
Michael attempts to sit down but the frame is too small and when he can't squeeze in he complains "Nobody would fit in that little frame".
"I'm afraid if you can't fit in the frame you'll have to pay an extra surcharge of €4.00 for your seat sir"
O'Leary swore to himself, but paid up. "I see that you have brought your laptop with you" added the barman. "And since that wasn't pre-booked either, that will be another 3 euro."
O'Leary was so annoyed that he walked back to the bar, slammed his drink on the counter, and yelled, "This is ridiculous, I want to speak to the manager".
"Ah, I see you want to use the counter," says the barman, "that will be 2 euro please." O'Leary's face was red with rage.
"Do you know who I am?"
"Of course I do Mr. O'Leary,"
"I've had enough, What sort of Hotel is this? I come in for a quiet drink and you treat me like this. I insist on speaking to a manager!"
"Here is his E mail address, or if you wish, you can contact him between 9 and 9.10 every morning, Monday to Tuesday at this free phone number. Calls are free, until they are answered, then there is a talking charge of only 10 cent per second"
"I will never use this bar again"
"OK sir, but remember, we are the only hotel in Ireland selling pints for one Euro"
Bwahahahahahaha!!! ^.^
RispondiEliminaÈ possibile che O'Leary si sia ispirato a questa barzelletta per organizzare la tariffazione di Ryanair?
Magari! Temo sia tutta farina del suo sacco u.u'
Elimina